Motivational quotes and admonitions appear on social media sites and in self-help books, discouraging us from needing praise to feel good about ourselves. It’s good advice, and I know I’ve gotten better at flying my own kite no matter which way the winds around me are blowing. If you find yourself in a relationship or an environment where accolades are thin on the ground, you could quickly flounder if the approval of others is the only thing behind your self-esteem.
It’s important for us to observe and acknowledge our own excellent work and the positive steps we’ve taken in our lives. If you don’t have a shoulder injury, pat yourself on the back. You are good enough without the approval of others.
BUT
(There is always a BUT with this one isn’t there?)
I wonder if in trying to make our world less dependent on praise we’ve become stingy with it.
It’s good to not RELY on the approval of others but does this automatically lead to the argument that giving praise is BAD?
I don’t think so.
When a boss, co-worker, friend or family member sees what you are about, what you have done and gives you kudos for it, it’s not necessarily about giving you praise you NEED. It does create awareness that you aren’t the only one out there that knows you are doing incredible things in the world.
Alternatively, there’s a trend in some workplaces, mandating managers to give praise. Mandated praise… let that sink in. Nothing sucks the meaning out of a compliment faster than suspecting the giver is reading from a script.
Go team!
If it smells insincere, that’s how it’s received…like a bit of food gone “off.” Give praise…but only when you feel it is truly deserved.
As for me and this particular kite I’m flying, I’m having fun writing this blog; I’m exercising my communication skills. I know I’m doing okay for someone relatively new to this game.
When I received a compliment from one of the best writers I know, it meant something to me and was an encouragement.
Did I NEED her encouragement to keep putting these thoughts rambling around my head out into the world? No.
But it still felt good.
The same person is really good at giving me constructive criticism when I need it. I learn from it, and that’s okay too.
Get out there folks, give compliments and encouragement when they are due.
I think it may be okay.
